I moved my office at Ford
recently, from Livonia to Dearborn . I packed and carried to the new
office two or three boxes of personal memorabilia, items toward which I’ve
grown increasingly fond of and, as time passes, grow increasingly meaningful to
me.
There are objects that my
kids made in pre-school, including an odd carved wooden object that Matthew,
now 28, made. It reminds me of a dolphin slicing through the water. It has two nails
sticking out of it at different angles and when people see it, it serves for me
as a kind of weird Rorschach test as they interpret what they see. I never know
what they’ll say.
There’s an oversize poster that
my daughter Kelly, now 24, created years ago while she was visiting my office.
It has the word “Kelly” written several times across it in a free-form style,
in different sizes. It’s accented by creative streaks of color slashing through
the poster, that play off her name in a je
ne sais quoi artistry that I find captivating.
These two items have
something in common: an attitude toward life and living that is bold, is fresh,
and declares an absence of self-consciousness or of fear.
There’s another item in my
office, a group photograph of several young men, which shares these same
qualities.
It was taken in July 1997, ten
years ago, when my son and his friends graduated from high school. It was
toward the end of a graduation party that occurred late in the season for such
parties.
The photo was taken at the
home of Richie Kostrzewski, one of Matthew’s friends in high school. The party
was hosted by Richie’s Mom and Dad.
The photo was taken toward
the end of the party, late in the afternoon. It was a hot, sunny day.
The boys, there are 11 of
them in the photo, are illuminated by the sunlight, and stand or kneel around
some shrubbery accenting the rear of the house, which is immediately behind
them.
Above the boys, in the upper
center of the photo, is a dark blue flag with large white letters. The flag
says, at the top, “Catholic Central.” At the bottom, it says “Shamrocks.”
Separating these sets of words
in the middle are two large interlocking white letters that say “CC.” Following
the letters is a small symbol of a shamrock.
The flag describes who they
are, and provides a little perspective. But it is the boys’ faces and postures
that speak volumes about their youth, their confidence and, ultimately, their
happiness.
Each is smiling, flashing
bright white teeth. Some are laughing. The eyes are sparkling except for the
two unfortunate souls who blinked as the camera’s shutter snapped.
Several of those standing
have hands on their hips, boldly proclaiming who they are. Several have
baseball caps. Those kneeling in the front are relaxed and comfortable. Again,
some are laughing. They’re having a good time.
What looks like a soccer ball
rests in the shrubbery, an apt accent for their enjoyment of participation in
sports, sparked by the competitive desire that I witnessed burning in each of
them for those four years.
The young man in the middle,
John Faunce, would leave the party shortly after the photo was taken, to travel
with his Dad in their Econoline Van to West Point ,
where he would graduate as a lieutenant in the U.S. Army four years hence.
The boys (I suppose they
always will remain “boys” to me) were and are great friends. They met as
freshmen when they ran cross-country and track together, and continued to
improve and grow together as athletes and friends through their senior year.
Detroit Catholic Central, often
referred to as CC, is an all-boys high school that was founded in 1928 in Detroit , on Harper Avenue near
Woodward. It has had a long history in
southeastern Michigan ,
occupying several different sites in Metro Detroit. It moved a couple years ago
from Breakfast Drive in Redford, where the boys went to school, to a brand-new
site in Novi .
CC’s motto is “Teach me
goodness, discipline and knowledge.” And the Basilian priests who run the
school, with the help of lay teachers and staff, take to heart that mission.
My introduction to CC
discipline arrived when the boys and their parents had gathered as incoming
freshmen at the school for an orientation, and were being seated on the
bleachers in the gym.
Matthew didn’t have any
friends in Belleville
that went to CC. He had made up his mind in the fifth grade, while he went to St. Anthony School in Belleville ,
that he wanted to go to CC.
In sixth grade, he moved to South Middle
School , where he stayed till he left for CC to
begin the ninth grade, leaving some good friends that he made at South.
Back in the CC gym, Father
Moffatt, the principal, waited patiently at the microphone for everyone to be
seated. The boys had been given CC baseball caps saying “Class of 1997” as a
token of their initiation into the school, and many still wore the caps as they
sat waiting in the bleachers.
Father Moffatt requested that
the boys remove their caps as a token of respect for the prayer he was about to
say, a benediction toward the incoming freshmen and the beginning of their
shared experience for the next four years.
Many of the boys removed
their caps at the first request, but a few did not. Father Moffatt returned to
the microphone and, in an unmistakable tone, said, “Boys, remove your caps.”
He added, just in case he
wasn’t being sufficiently clear as to what the boys and their parents should
expect, “At CC, you’ll learn to follow instructions the first time.”
Whoa! He had me from that
moment. We later were given a small magnetic sign for our refrigerator door
with CC’s phone number and the name of its Vice Principal, Mr. Hayes. One of
Mr. Hayes’ duties was student discipline.
We were assured that, if our
boys got out of line in or out of school and we needed a little assistance,
that we should simply call Mr. Hayes and he would provide some help.
I don’t mean to suggest that
CC was a type of military school, in which discipline ruled all and fear of
authority was the watchword.
It wasn’t. In fact, the boys
were cut added slack by the administration as they became upperclassmen, as
long as they stayed within the behavioral bounds they now understood. Their
time at CC often was filled with fun, leavened with academic and athletic
standards they were expected and encouraged to achieve.
Imagine if you will the sound
of a bowling ball rolling down an empty school corridor. The classroom in which
you are sitting shifts suddenly from order to distraction to disorder.
The rolling ball creates a
booming sound, a little ominous as it rolls unencumbered along the tile floor,
crashing at intervals into lockers and caroming back into the center of the
corridor.
This is among the pranks
leading to the annual CC event known as Boys’ Bowl (Get it? Bowling Ball?). The
Boys Bowl was begun years ago as an annual football game between CC and Boys Town
in Nebraska, as a fundraiser for the boys school founded by Father Flanagan.
The annual game metamorphosed
over the years into a football game between CC and a Catholic League rival, and
when Matthew attended CC, the opponent was Brother Rice.
CC usually got the better of
Brother Rice in those days (not anymore, sadly), but Rice was even then a supremely
worthy adversary.
I recall one year where CC
was down by three points with less than a minute to go. Its players marched
downfield, crossing into Rice territory, but were stopped on third down with
just a few seconds left on the clock.
The field goal to tie the
game was witnessed by over 3,000 people. It featured a football that floated 50
yards down the field, barely passing above the crossbar, between the uprights.
The CC side in Wisner Stadium
in Pontiac
erupted in joy and disbelief. Friends, a 50-yard field in high school is a rare
thing. And this was and is no less true of CC than other high schools.
Despite this, however, we
reminded ourselves that it now was an altogether new game, in overtime. Time in
regulation had expired.
But how could the Shamrocks
lose the game after such an inspiring finish in regulation? And, as fate would
have it, CC won. What a day. What a victory. The picture in my mind’s eye of
that day is almost as clear as the picture of the boys at the graduation party.
The boys in the photo never
did get into much trouble. Although they loved pranks, they rarely broke the
law. In fact, they respected authority - they might just tweak it a bit.
Over the years, they stood together
throughout CC football and basketball games as very involved fans, and delighted
especially in exchanging insults across football fields with the aforementioned
boys of archrival Brother Rice High School
in Birmingham .
“What’s a Shamrock?” the
Brother Rice boys would ask from the bleachers on their side of the field, as
they taunted their rivals. “Ask your girlfriend,” the CC boys would slyly respond
on the opposite side of the field.
At other times, the boys would
chant other phrases, including “We Are…CC!” They were and are proud of their
shared experience. CC provided the common thread that unites them as they continue
their life’s journey as adults.
With pretty young ladies on
their arms, they went to proms and homecoming dances, all dressed up, patiently
posing for photos happily snapped by their excited parents, especially the
Moms.
They have remained great good
friends despite changes in their lives in the last decade. They went to
different universities, they got different jobs, they have moved out of the
state, but still they come together to celebrate big events in their lives as
they continue to grow as adults, particularly weddings and the bachelor parties
that precede the weddings.
Make that bachelor weekends.
The boys have extended the customary hell-raising evening out into a weekend
that begins on Friday and ends on Sunday. By that time, they are exhausted and
hung over (on one weekend trip, my son claimed to have slept for a total of
four hours), often returning home on an airplane.
Many of these events have
taken place outside the state, including twice to Las Vegas ,
and once each to New Orleans , Pittsburgh
and Key West .
But, despite the occasional
hell-raising, they have grown into adults. Several have married. One, who lives
in Arizona ,
has a child. John Faunce, who lives on an Army base in North
Carolina , is a Captain who completed two tours of duty in Iraq .
Another is a dentist. Two are
teachers, a few are automotive engineers, and others are in financial careers
like mortgage banking.
And you know what? Their
attitudes haven’t changed.
They are confident, they are
cocksure, and they are great fun to be with. Despite the confidence, however,
there’s a self-imposed limit: they respect others and themselves. The CC motto
stuck.
I had the opportunity to join
them last year for Matthew’s bachelor weekend in Pittsburgh , because Matthew selected me to be
his best man for his wedding.
Matthew selected Pittsburgh for the
bachelor weekend because, after having coached there at a couple summer
basketball camps after high school, he grew to like the people. Years ago, he
told John Faunce, with whom he sometimes coached, that he would return to Pittsburgh for his
bachelor party.
On the bachelor weekend, I
was able to keep up with them through Friday night and about 3 a.m. Saturday
morning. I got some sleep, but I had to beg off about 9:30 p.m. that Saturday
night after dinner, returning to the place where we stayed, where I quietly
watched TV, alone. The break from the activity was a blessing - I was gassed.
But it was worth it. I was
able to party with them for at least a short while that weekend, and I got to
know each of them a little better.
The time that I spent with
them helped me to understand more clearly their bond with each other, providing
a brief glimpse of their connection, an attachment born in youth, in
confidence, and in optimism.
It is captured and kept for
all time in that decade-old photo of eleven young men who continue to enjoy a
common experience with each other, which helped to make them who they are
today.
They were, and are…CC.
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